Wedding Services for the UK
Wedding Gifts Advice
To have or have not?
The dilemma couples face when choosing whether or not to have a gift list.
There are many things to agonise over in the run up to your wedding and whether to have a gift list or not is one of them.
Of course, in the days when the bride and groom only moved in together after their wedding, having a gift list was commonplace. After all, the giving of gifts had a practicality to it – it was to provide the couple with items that they could use for their new home.
Towels, a toaster, a set of pans and crystal glasses were wished-for gifts and were welcomed by the young couple, who were struggling to get everything together for their new home.
In today’s world though, where most people live together before getting married, many couples struggle to think of household items that they actually need. As one bride-to-be put it: “I’ve got more towels than I know what to do with and, let’s face it, if I do need a new kettle, I just pop along to the local supermarket and pick up a cheap one.”
Naturally, there may always be that expensive pink cappuccino-maker that you’ve had your eye on for ages but do you actually need it? After the consumerism of the 80s and 90s, the noughties have seen a move to a more green and ethical way of shopping and thinking; what’s become important is not what we possess but our relationships with the people around us.
And that’s another reason why traditional gift lists may becoming less popular; the couple are aware of how much their guests are already having to fork out on an outfit and travel to the wedding – isn’t it just a bit cheeky, they ask themselves, to then ask them for a gift? Helen and Chris, who got married in June of this year, felt this way. Helen says: “A lot of our friends were travelling from all over the country to be at our wedding. Why should they spend another fifty pounds or so on a gift when we had everything we needed? Just their being there and taking the time to celebrate our day with us was more than enough for us.”
Although a lot of couples feel the same way as Helen and Chris, it’s not always down to the happy couple as to whether they have a gift list or not; their guests often insist upon it! They like to give their loved ones a token of their affection on their wedding day and would prefer some guidance on what the couple actually want.
Kathryn who was a guest at her sister’s wedding in November echoes the thoughts of a lot of guests: “My sister was at first determined not to have a list. But I know that, because she’s so picky, if I’d have just bought something, she wouldn’t have liked it! It’s so much better to have a list so that you know exactly what they want.”
Those couples who do come round to the idea of having a list are more likely to look for a flexible gift list service, one where they can list things like charity donations and honeymoon contributions alongside the more usual items. Using such a service caters for all guests and being able to make a donation to charity satisfies both the socially-responsible couple and their guests.
They are also looking for a gift list service that looks after their guests, that doesn’t charge them high delivery or commission charges. Sarah Barratt, who is getting married in February next year, chose to have her gift list with www.e-weddinglist.co.uk. She explains why: “A lot of the online lists didn't really have what we wanted, or they charged high administration and/or delivery fees, or their prices were higher that you'd find elsewhere. That’s why we went for e-weddinglist. As it’s not a store, our guests can shop around for their gift and, hopefully, save money!”
Deciding on whether to have a gift list or not can be another headache for the bride and groom. Whatever they decide to do, their underlying feeling is that they want to do right by their guests and, because guests almost always insist on having a list, that often results in choosing a gift list service that is flexible and is free for their guests to use.
The dilemma couples face when choosing whether or not to have a gift list.
There are many things to agonise over in the run up to your wedding and whether to have a gift list or not is one of them.
Of course, in the days when the bride and groom only moved in together after their wedding, having a gift list was commonplace. After all, the giving of gifts had a practicality to it – it was to provide the couple with items that they could use for their new home.
Towels, a toaster, a set of pans and crystal glasses were wished-for gifts and were welcomed by the young couple, who were struggling to get everything together for their new home.
In today’s world though, where most people live together before getting married, many couples struggle to think of household items that they actually need. As one bride-to-be put it: “I’ve got more towels than I know what to do with and, let’s face it, if I do need a new kettle, I just pop along to the local supermarket and pick up a cheap one.”
Naturally, there may always be that expensive pink cappuccino-maker that you’ve had your eye on for ages but do you actually need it? After the consumerism of the 80s and 90s, the noughties have seen a move to a more green and ethical way of shopping and thinking; what’s become important is not what we possess but our relationships with the people around us.
And that’s another reason why traditional gift lists may becoming less popular; the couple are aware of how much their guests are already having to fork out on an outfit and travel to the wedding – isn’t it just a bit cheeky, they ask themselves, to then ask them for a gift? Helen and Chris, who got married in June of this year, felt this way. Helen says: “A lot of our friends were travelling from all over the country to be at our wedding. Why should they spend another fifty pounds or so on a gift when we had everything we needed? Just their being there and taking the time to celebrate our day with us was more than enough for us.”
Although a lot of couples feel the same way as Helen and Chris, it’s not always down to the happy couple as to whether they have a gift list or not; their guests often insist upon it! They like to give their loved ones a token of their affection on their wedding day and would prefer some guidance on what the couple actually want.
Kathryn who was a guest at her sister’s wedding in November echoes the thoughts of a lot of guests: “My sister was at first determined not to have a list. But I know that, because she’s so picky, if I’d have just bought something, she wouldn’t have liked it! It’s so much better to have a list so that you know exactly what they want.”
Those couples who do come round to the idea of having a list are more likely to look for a flexible gift list service, one where they can list things like charity donations and honeymoon contributions alongside the more usual items. Using such a service caters for all guests and being able to make a donation to charity satisfies both the socially-responsible couple and their guests.
They are also looking for a gift list service that looks after their guests, that doesn’t charge them high delivery or commission charges. Sarah Barratt, who is getting married in February next year, chose to have her gift list with www.e-weddinglist.co.uk. She explains why: “A lot of the online lists didn't really have what we wanted, or they charged high administration and/or delivery fees, or their prices were higher that you'd find elsewhere. That’s why we went for e-weddinglist. As it’s not a store, our guests can shop around for their gift and, hopefully, save money!”
Deciding on whether to have a gift list or not can be another headache for the bride and groom. Whatever they decide to do, their underlying feeling is that they want to do right by their guests and, because guests almost always insist on having a list, that often results in choosing a gift list service that is flexible and is free for their guests to use.